Stop dancing like that. it looks like [https://cdn1.khanacademy.org/storage/dr1/f8/f8afbf2627c5f9a2...](https://cdn1.khanacademy.org/storage/dr1/f8/f8afbf2627c5f9a2e85bdb2cdafd48b2.jpg) (sorry for being mean) ~~~ derefr Are they looking for someone who _doesn 't_ think like that? When you see someone dancing like that, what does your emotional reaction usually look like? Is it "I don 't like how they dance, so I'll just close my eyes and pretend they're not here, and pretend this isn't happening"? Or is it "I really appreciate that this person is dancing, because they aren't trying to get me to listen to them, or be impressed by them, or do something with them." From my experience with dancing, the only time people put on their "Dancing Shows" is when they've decided to go _out_ dancing, with people. It's all a spectacle—like, "you made it out of the house! You're brave! Here, enjoy these people, they've put on a show for you!" The problem is, when the venue is the "home" (i.e. one's home with a partner, for a regular, recurring thing that starts and ends on the same schedule), there's nothing to _dance for_ , nothing to dance _to_ , there's nothing to dance _at_ , because there's no dancing _around_ , either. So dancing can look like those three dancing people, and not look like the dance. People go back to square one: the person's trying to get themselves to move in the way they see others moving in, and having a good time; and if the person feels the music isn't giving them the feeling they're looking for, then their only two choices are to dance by force, or stop dancing altogether. ------ S_A_P I would say the real culprit here is the american culture of consumption and consumerism. Even this post feels like an ad for the show.... ~~~ gipp That's true for the dancing itself, and I agree. It's worth noting the author has a lot of great personal experiences in the world of dancing/music. ------ kevin_thibedeau The way these folks dance is how children danced before choreographers coerced them into doing ballet. ~~~ smacktoward There is no real evidence that "children danced" before "choreographers" did anything, let alone that "choreographers" made a fundamental contribution to the whole enterprise. If anything, the origins of dance, like the origins of all forms of music, appear to lie far more in the traditions of ritual than in any individual "choreographer." ~~~ kevin_thibedeau Ritual and community. ~~~ gipp Well, ritual for sure, but also in the sense that they were trying to _feel_ the rhythms and beats that they were hearing in a certain way. ------ aethertron Dancing can be an excellent form of exercise, and is an excellent form of exercise for the brain and body. But you can't do something very strenuous, and then just stop! That can be very, very difficult, and it has a great influence on muscle tone and stability. For this reason I enjoy the slow dancing of the samba, I also really like (almost too much) dancing alone to any song that has a good rhythm. I can't stand dancing to slow songs that are supposed to be romantic or emotional, especially if it's a slow one. There needs to be some variety, both to dance to and in. ~~~ TillE > I can't stand dancing to slow songs that are supposed to be romantic or > emotional, especially if it's a slow one. I like songs in the ballpark of 80bpm or so, though it does depend on the tempo. It's nice to just put your attention on the song for a bit. And there are plenty of romantic or emotional ballads, plenty of slower ones too. For dancing alone, I find it easy to work with slow classical music. Classical music is generally not about speed or pace. Just nice, beautiful phrases. I guess it's easier to dance with a partner if you can relate to the music as a partner can. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qs_g1cG8DZU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qs_g1cG8DZU) ------ bluthru "There is no such thing as a good, old-time dancer." This article reads like an ad. It's a bit meta and the content only loosely applies to dancing. ------ brianmcc This isn't quite accurate (and I don't say that to be a dick about it): > _That is, if one doesn’t have perfect pitch. Most people don’t. I have > perfect pitch, but most people don’t. There are lots of things people do that others don’t. Some of those things aren’t a problem—as in “I don’t know how to make pie,” so I decide not to bother. But if it’s not a matter of not knowing how to do something, it may be that it’s not as crucial to me as it is to others. That’s why people are so freaked out when you can do something they can’t. It’s the difference between something that’s merely weird, and something that’s subversive. Something that’s weird can still be fun, but subversive breaks things. Like, at least when I dance, I’m dancing with people, not with the idea of people. Yes, I care about them. I do. But I care more about making a scene than I do about them. To me, the point of dancing is seeing your friends dance and enjoying the experience._ I disagree. The real value of dancing is the way it brings us together, not because you can dance but because you can dance well or dance uniquely. We should take a step back and ask ourselves whether the pursuit of dancing is harmful or not. I haven't seen this addressed here and I don't really see it being addressed by the article or article's author. ------ aaron-lebo I've said it before and I'll say it again: Any person who can't dance and/or doesn't like dancing is a person who would be very boring to me, because I'm much more invested in dancing. It's probably the second most fun I've ever had (not that I'm in the best position to evaluate that, but my wife says she's had fun). ~~~ norswap This might just be me. I find dancing is the most fun when I'm alone, in partnership (maybe 1) or (unfortunately) in a group. The former situation can bring out the best of you, and the latter is too risky (because you have to keep track of the other people). And most of the time, especially in public, it's a waste of time, and the risk it creates is not worth it. Edit: a few clarifications, based on the comments. ~~~ pavel_lishin I have fun dancing alone, but it's far better to dance with a partner or in a group of people you know well. When you're dancing in a large group, you're going to do anything you can to dance to the beat of whoever the current crowd chooses. That can easily become someone else's set; if it's the kind of music you really enjoy, you have to wait until they stop dancing to try to get them to listen to yours. If you're not careful, you end up standing around awkwardly in a group staring at each other. When you're dancing alone, you can choose your own pace, to your own time. Dancing alone, you also don't have to keep track of other dancers. ------ tschellenbach This article seems to gloss over the fact that there's really two ways of looking at this: I can