Sometimes, I want you close to me," she said. "Other times, I want you at a distance. It depends on how I'm feeling." "Mmm." His hands traced lazy patterns on her back. He shifted, lifting up so her legs draped over him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her hands brushed the edge of his shirt, but the sudden movement made her dizzy and she slumped against him. "There," he said. "Much better." "I don't know what happened." She blinked, trying to clear her thoughts. "It just happened." "It happened because I want it to happen. Just as you wanted it to happen when you kissed me in the bar." "I thought I was giving you an order." She tried to push off him but he pinned her to the sofa. She looked up at him. "What are you doing?" "Enjoying your company." He took her hand and placed it on his heart. "And I like to think you're enjoying mine." He was full of surprises. She knew he wouldn't be content with her at a distance and that they had a great deal to discuss before things progressed any further. But he'd kissed her. That was an encouraging start. Maybe he could come to terms with things, if they were willing to put in the effort. She'd give him time to adjust. Not that she could be at a distance forever. Not when he felt so good pressed against her. But right now, in this moment, she'd be happy just to be held by him. "Cody?" She traced the edge of his jaw, enjoying the stubble and the way it rasped when she touched it. "Do you want to be alone?" "Do you?" he countered. "Yeah. Probably." He shrugged, then put his hand over hers. "I'm not too good with being alone." "You shouldn't let that bother you." She stroked his jaw. He looked deeply into her eyes, and she realized that all he had to do was push and they would tumble into each other. It was terrifying to know that with all the physical attraction between them, they could still be in denial of the feelings involved. She'd be lying to herself if she pretended she didn't care about him. She knew it was stupid and dangerous, but she couldn't seem to help herself. So much for putting distance between them. So much for thinking he'd give up on her. So much for thinking she could stay out of his life and he'd get over her. "Do you love me?" he asked. "That's irrelevant." She blinked and pulled her hand away, not wanting him to see the tears welling up. She wasn't ready to spill her guts, and right now that was what she felt like doing. He was going to hurt her again, she could feel it. But she wasn't going to take the risk that he would see how easily he could break her heart. "Why does that matter?" "Because I want to know." His brow furrowed and he looked confused. "It seems like it would be important." She shook her head. "No, not really." But that was a lie. Of course it was important. She would always wonder how she could have ended up in a situation that she couldn't escape. "I'm having trouble with all this." He sat up, moving away from her, and she almost fell back into his lap. He leaned against the back of the sofa and crossed his arms. His face was in shadow and his expression had gone blank, but she could still see him searching her face. "I don't want to hurt you," she said. "And I don't want to leave you." "If that were true, we wouldn't be in this situation." "There are consequences to everyone's choices." She was tired of talking in circles. "You don't get to choose to have a good relationship, or choose to keep your job, or choose to get help and choose not to hurt me. That's not how the world works." He glanced at his watch. "It's about time for us to make a decision." His voice was clipped and final. A chill spread through her, chilling her skin, her blood. She wanted to ask him what he meant, but the door swung open before she could think of anything to say. Cody jumped up and stepped in front of her. "Hi, Ryley." "Hey," the boy said. He sounded tired. He looked tired. "Hi, Evie." Ryley was still pale, but his freckles stood out against his cheeks and his chin dimpled when he smiled. "How are you?" "Good." Evie moved toward the sofa and sat down on the edge. She still wasn't sure what was going to happen with Cody and her son, but it was much better that Ryley stayed here with her. "I'll get some water, okay?" "Okay." Ryley followed her into the kitchen. "Everything's fine, Dad. It's just how you'd expect it to be." She filled a glass with water for him and Ryley took it from her. "Thanks." He took a sip. "I needed to say something before you left." She didn't move. "We need to go talk." "No, we don't," he said firmly. "I don't think that'll change anything. I think it'd just be better if we stop seeing each other." "We could try." She took a breath. "Ryley, if I tell you I love you, would you believe me?" "I know I do." He met her gaze, his expression serious. "Your dad doesn't like me. He says things are complicated. But they're not." "They're not as bad as he thinks they are." "They might not be," she agreed. "But I have to be honest with you. Sometimes I don't want to be here. It's hard for me to imagine how long it will be before I have to leave. I have a feeling we'll both be pretty tired when we try to explain what happened to the people who are expecting us to be normal. It's hard for me to imagine having the strength for that, even with your help." Ryley frowned, taking another sip of water. "I guess it might be tough." "I don't know what to do about this. Your dad and I don't know each other. We only saw each other for a minute and that was a long time ago. We could make a mess of it, but he won't see that it's not my fault. I can't do anything about it, unless you want to." "No, I don't," he said. "I was only trying to keep things nice. There's no way I can keep them that way." "You're right," she said. "I'm the one who messed up. I'm sorry." "It's okay." He leaned back against the counter. "I just wish Dad and I had a chance to make it work. But not like this. Not at all." She reached out and put her hand on his shoulder. "You're being strong for me." "So are you." He smiled. "But I'm glad we met." "Me too." She leaned her head against his shoulder. "I'm glad you're Ryley's dad." "Me too." He hugged her, and she rested her head against his chest. She felt safe there. "Thanks, Mom." He took her hand and led her back into the living room. Cody glanced at his watch again. "Dad has to leave soon." "I need to get going, too." He started toward the door, then turned back and took her arm. "I wish you'd let me explain some of what we're doing. It's all weird." "If there was one thing I could do, I'd tell you to get rid of the computers." She paused. "Maybe it's worth trying. Tell me when you've thought about it." "Yeah, I will." He opened the door. "I need to get to work." "I'll be at the store by ten," she said. "I'm getting a new printer." He nodded. "That's a good idea." He looked at Ryley. "I'll see you later, kiddo." "Okay." Cody left and Ryley turned to Evie. "I'm glad I went over there." "Me too." She paused. "How's the head? Does it hurt?" "No, but Mom and Dad are still arguing. She said he wasn't really interested in helping me with my homework and she couldn't get a good night's sleep." He took her hand. "I don't think they're ever going to make things work." "It's really good you told him, and it's good you told him now," she said. "Before I had to leave, he was so happy. I think he would have liked to do more with you. Maybe it'll