I plan to make this a habit each and every day now. To see my new normal is a comfort to me, I will be a survivor this Thanksgiving! “It’s not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood.” ~ Theodore Roosevelt (The Man in the Arena) I just read my last blog post about my friend who gave a beautiful gift to her child who was fighting for her life. The gift? A story from the Bible and an angel visit. Even though she and her child have been through some challenging times (see A New Normal: Surviving Breast Cancer), it is a comfort to know that this angel will look out for her and her child. And as I was reflecting on that part of my story and I realized that I never let myself just enjoy the good moments for what they are. I am the proverbial chameleon and try so hard to put on a happy face and hide away my pain because of the world we live in. We are so critical of ourselves and everyone around us, constantly comparing our lives with others. The problem is, we never focus on our own blessings. We always seem to be living through the eyes of others – always looking for faults and flaws and that is okay, but we need to take a minute and reflect on what we are blessed to have in our own lives. The good, the bad, and the ugly all have something to offer us. When I was in Germany this year I was able to see the Berlin Wall up close and personal. I was also able to attend a Berlin Christmas Market and see Santa Claus for myself! For the most part, people I met while on my trip were genuinely warm and accepting and I was able to share with them my story of having surgery in order to treat my cancer – a lot of them said they had no idea! Once I was able to share my story in a way that it was easy for them to understand, they accepted my story and moved on to sharing their stories with me. There was a gentleman that I met that had a story just as rough as my own but he told me about a man who once changed his life and he had never been the same again. He also said there was a man who once called him “a son of God” for his love of learning. He also encouraged me to “walk with God and he will provide.” He also recommended that I buy a Bible in German to encourage those who are going through struggles and are trying to find answers because “the Bible is the most wonderful book in the world and it is meant to be read, not just opened and closed like a book.” After talking with him I felt lighter in my heart. The good memories of my trip have made me realize the joy I take in the good times – I make myself remember the amazing experiences that I’ve had and not the sad parts. At the end of my stay I met up with an old friend from high school that I had not seen in years. We met up with his wife and daughter and celebrated his birthday – he was surprised and I think we all had a great time. I have been reading the book: The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. This book is very personal to me because I met Randy Pausch last year at a book signing and spent some time with him and his family. We have kept in touch ever since that time and I feel close to him. Reading his book reminded me of my story and I realized, I have really learned a lot and have truly grown as a person. We were given so much at such a young age and I guess I just took it for granted and thought that I’d be alright and that my situation would end up ok. For once in my life, instead of going out in the real world and looking for a partner who will be a partner in crime with me, I have found that the real world and my thoughts have taken me the wrong way. I think the problem lies in the lack of a higher power in my life. I try to put my trust in something and although I try to do that on my own, I feel at a loss and it is a great feeling to turn back to God and I feel better about myself because I feel that he has truly blessed me with more than I could ever ask for. This past week I heard of a story that was shared about a man who, when he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, said that he was thankful because this is just a speed bump on the way to the Pearly Gates and once he got there, he would be greeted by angels. The fact that I will be seeing angels again really made me think about things in a different light. I now look at things as if I could have an angel on my shoulder as well – that being the kind words of those who have truly changed my life. I have heard the kindest words of a stranger in the grocery store and the most hateful words come from friends that I love. I will forever cherish the kind words I heard from my friend and I have learned that this life is short and if we want to help a person we can and if we want to take an opportunity to grow, we should. It takes us only a second to learn what kind of person a person is based on their actions – our hearts can be changed in the blink of an eye. It would be amazing if there was more kindness in the world and we have so much to learn from people like Jesus and Randy Pausch. I am truly blessed. “But to me, all of those experiences have amounted to something much deeper, and something much more profound. They’ve been an opportunity for me to discover a little bit more about myself. They’ve been an opportunity for me to realize that if I’m not afraid of falling, I may just fly.” ~ Randy Pausch (The Last Lecture) Sometimes in life we lose sight of what is important. We stop listening to those around us because we are busy running around and we tend to tune out, turning our heads away from others who have no one. We get so involved in being able to get things done that we forget to enjoy the small moments that are so critical to our existence. It is amazing how when we listen to the stories that others have been sharing with us, we learn to look forward to those people and to enjoy them for the amazing beings they are and how they can touch your life in a meaningful way. There is nothing more comforting than having someone who is there for you and who is there to help you in every way they can. It is wonderful to look forward to someone who can be a shoulder to cry on or a shoulder to lean on when we are going through a hard time. It’s a comfort to have a friend that you can talk to about any problem. Being able to turn to someone and tell them about your troubles and then to have them being there for you, holding your hand, wiping your tears, telling you to just let it out and have a good cry can change your perspective on life and help you cope with anything that you may be facing. So when I started feeling overwhelmed by the world around me, I turned to people who are dear to me and I opened up to them – they have helped me through the good times and the bad times. I could never begin to explain how much joy, love and understanding that God has in store for me. It’s also wonderful to be in a place where so many different things can happen at any time. We are each like a work of art and are allowed to grow and change. Sometimes we realize that we want to change a piece of our life to look different from what it is and we make it so that it is beautiful. What a beautiful gift that God has given to us and how thankful I am for having so many people in my life who have brought so much joy and laughter into my life. As I look back on the times when I didn’t share my joy, I can say that if you didn’t see me smiling, then I was probably dealing with a problem. People are like the oxygen that we need – people are the ones who allow us to live. I hope and pray that one day I can change people’s lives as much as people have changed mine. If you are feeling down, having a bad day, feel like you want to give up, then just look around – there are people everywhere that need you and you could help them get through anything. We are made up of flesh and bones and no matter what happens, remember how special each and every one of us is and never forget