And I’m out at a party, they’re going, “Oh, are you Jewish? You’re Jewish? Don’t say it around Steve Jobs, okay? He doesn’t like to hear that.” We’re like, “Fuck you.” But no, we just don’t say it. I mean, I don’t know about Steve Jobs. He might be like, “Fuck that.” I don’t know. So, are you a Jew? Yeah. What does that mean? What do you mean, what does it mean? You’ve been raised in the Jewish religion? Yeah. I’m about one quarter. I’m not really all that Jewish. You must have a lot of Jewish influences. You talk about Jewish humor all the time in your book, in your standup, and you love Woody Allen, and— Well, what is it? You mean being a Jew? I don’t know, what is it? I’m asking if you’re Jewish. Yeah, you don’t get to decide. But do you have a sense of yourself as a Jew? No. I feel like we’re getting into crazy shit now. But that’s the big question. Do you have a sense of yourself as a Jew? Yeah. It has absolutely nothing to do with anything. I don’t get to decide. My mom was a Lutheran, and my dad was Lutheran, and they sent me to a Lutheran school, but I don’t have a very good relationship with my mom, so I don’t know how she would feel about that, but I love the rituals, and the food. I love bagels. So I guess that makes me Jewish in a way, even though I don’t have a very good relationship with my mom. But there is nothing Jewish about me, no offense to all of you. I have nothing against your culture or anyone else’s culture, I don’t really care, but you’ve got to admit, there’s something a little bit creepy about this. I mean, Jesus Christ, I have to be a Jew? I just came from talking to my mom. No, that’s not what I mean. Then what is it? It seems like you’re trying to get me to acknowledge the connection between Jews and comedy, as if I haven’t addressed it in the book. I can see that I have talked about it a lot, but what I meant was— I don’t know if that’s what you meant. Is it? Because it seems like that’s what you meant. You know what I mean? I am saying it as if it were true, and you have talked about the connection in your work, but does it actually feel to you that you have to be Jewish in order to do comedy? That’s the crazy thing about it. I do this character on TV who is an uptight, conservative Republican, but I’m not conservative, and I don’t watch TV. I don’t have to have anything to do with it. Not true, that’s not the point I’m trying to get at. I feel like you’re trying to get at something, but I don’t have any idea what. Just the sense that you have been asked to be a Jew. And what has that got to do with comedy? I’m not even sure what we’re talking about. We could be talking about something entirely different. I don’t know. The sense that you have had to defend yourself and to make this a statement. I think it was an interviewer who said, “You know, Jews are funny.” I was kind of like, “Get out of my face. I’m not here to defend myself for being Jewish.” I don’t see it as defensiveness. I think it’s a little bit paranoid, to be honest. No, I’m saying it’s not defensiveness. How would I know? It doesn’t seem like you are. Well, if you have so many Jewish comics who are in denial about their Jewishness— Who are you talking about? Are there Jewish comics you know? I’m just making an observation. Then I’m saying, “Get out of my face.” You got to get over yourself. In some cases, yeah. What are these comics, these Jewish comics you’re talking about? I would love to hear about them. Well, for example, Jonathan Winters. Are you reading that in the paper? No, I’m reading your fucking book. I mean, I’m just making an observation. Then you’re overthinking it. Okay. When it comes to comedy, who else is in your world of Jews that aren’t being brought up as comedians? How about Jerry Seinfeld? You’re not talking about Jews, you’re talking about comedians. How many Jews were involved in his show? Were there Jews involved in Seinfeld’s show? Yeah, yeah, there were. No, we’re just talking about comedians. Why can’t you just stick with that? Why do you keep bringing up Jews and comedy? How about my family? My family isn’t in the entertainment business. Yeah, but come on. Are you Jewish? Are you Jewish? You just called my mother a Lutheran. But what about the Jews that are involved in the business? I mean, there’s a lot of them. Again, I’m talking about comic Jews. When you’re talking about people in the media and comics and writers and actors, there are more of them. I mean, we’re talking about Jews. What are you talking about? Are you talking about the fact that Jewish women can’t get their periods for 30 years? We’re talking about something else. Well, if you don’t consider Seinfeld a comic, why don’t you consider him? Because he’s Jewish. And people think of him as a comedian first and a Jew second. So why do you insist on bringing up the comedic implications of being Jewish, and not just the fact that he is Jewish? I’m not bringing it up. You just said, “Jews are funny.” I said, “Jewish comedians.” I don’t think it’s overthinking. I think it’s a pretty basic observation, that Jews have always been funny. You know who’s Jewish? Yeah, I know who’s Jewish. That’s not the point. How about Sarah Silverman? She’s not Jewish. She’s Jewish-looking. Why is she not Jewish? Why are you putting her in the Jews column? I don’t want to say “Jew.” Why not? Because it’s the truth. That’s not the point. No, that’s the point, if you were being honest about this. The point is you like Jews. You are more inclined to like Jews than anybody else because they’re funny. That’s how you feel about it. No other reason. When you talk about it, you can’t help but use words like Jew. You don’t have to. It’s just the way you feel. I didn’t say I like Jews. I said I liked Sarah Silverman. But, yes, I do find Jewish comedians funny. You have to understand that I don’t talk about this because I think it’s the great mystery. I’m not saying, “Oh, I don’t get it. I just keep telling Jews they’re Jewish, that’s the point of the joke.” Do you find Jewish comedians funny? I don’t find Jewish comedians funny. I just find— What do you mean? I mean, I am attracted to Sarah Silverman. I am attracted to Jewish humor, even though I don’t find the humor that funny. She just happens to make me laugh. Do you find comedians more funny, Jewish comedians or non-Jewish comedians? Non-Jewish comedians, I guess. You seem a little bit defensive about the fact that you are Jewish. No, I am not defensive about anything. If you wanted to talk about the Holocaust, or something, I’m not trying to not take your questions seriously, because it seems like you’re just interested in me because I’m Jewish. I don’t understand what the fascination with Jewishness is. I didn’t even make the decision to be Jewish. I understand what the fascination is. I just don’t understand why you seem defensive about it. I don’t know what to tell you. It’s just not interesting to me. My being Jewish is the most boring thing ever. I don’t know why you want to talk about it. But aren’t you a bit defensive about it? I mean, you don’t seem to want