That sure doesn't help. I feel your pain. We are the same age, and I've been doing the same thing for two years. The difference is, I'm still married with three kids! I try to stay busy and not think about it, but it never ends, so I'm going to put it out there. Do you think I should stay with my husband and see if it gets better? –Fleeing from Love Dear Fleeing, I hope you decide to call a suicide hotline because you are the type of person who needs a lot of help. While we cannot give medical advice, my sense is that if it feels like you are a ticking time bomb, then maybe it would be a good idea to get some professional help to help you deal with this. I am thinking of calling my therapist. She is a genius. She is on call all the time, so call her now. Maybe she has a magic prescription you can take to fix this. You are right: This isn't healthy and it's not easy. As a mental health professional myself, I know that if you feel trapped, what you're experiencing is depression. I understand that this is very hard and unfair. You might not think you are suffering, and in fact you might not even be depressed, but what you're feeling is the result of a chemical imbalance in your brain. I think this chemical imbalance is why some people are drawn to religion, but I am not going to tell you what to do. My only advice is to figure out how you can stay busy in order to make the depression go away. If this doesn't work, don't forget the suicide hotline. The next letter is written to me. I've received many letters from parents complaining that the schools refuse to change their kids' clothes. Dear Dr. Adler, This whole letter is going to be in regards to your daughter's wardrobe. I'm writing you because I don't want her to get caught in this trap. She was so upset when I told her that her T-shirt had to be changed to the school's uniform. What do you think is wrong with these schools? Are they getting kickbacks from the clothing company? My daughter is very pretty and very nice, and she wants to be a cheerleader. –Wants Her Haircut Dear Wants Her Haircut, You are not helping your daughter by demanding that she wear a uniform. I think this is a mistake. It is best to allow your daughter to express her individuality through fashion. Instead of being angry, why don't you take your daughter shopping and let her know that she has some input in this process? If you do this, maybe she will develop some self-confidence. Once your daughter becomes more secure, she might even feel comfortable enough to wear her makeup at school. I wish you the best. Dear Dr. Adler, My husband and I have been married for eleven years, and his parents have been married for more than twenty-five years. After about three years, his mother started bringing her boyfriend over to the house. This is very strange to me because she is very religious and was raised very strict. I do not think she even let the guy say hello to her in the beginning. She also introduced him to my son, and then my son started calling him by his first name instead of calling him "my uncle." This went on for about three years and I guess his son took to calling him "Nick," and my son started calling him Nick, so they started to be friends. My son started calling the guy Nick and calling me Mom. But why does this bother me so much? I am going to tell my husband how I feel, and I don't think I'm doing anything wrong. I have been very nice to this guy, I have introduced him to my kids, and I have called him by his first name. I have a good relationship with my husband and family. –Unnamed Dear Unnamed, In general, I don't like people interfering in my private relationships. That is why it's hard to accept the person you are describing. But let's try to figure out what is really going on here. Clearly the man in question is not being honest with your son. Otherwise he would not be calling him by his first name or your husband by the name of Nick. Now the reason you are doing this may be because you want to help your son have a good relationship with his father's ex-wife, but the only thing this is going to do is make you feel insecure. I think that it's possible that you are subconsciously jealous of the woman. Or it's possible that you are afraid of losing your husband. Again, you must deal with this in your therapy, but just know that I think your concerns are legitimate. Your children deserve an honest parent. The rest of this letter is a bit of a blur because I am so upset. I have never met your husband or son, but as a therapist, I can see that you have made yourself vulnerable. All I can tell you is to have faith in yourself and trust your instincts. You know the problem. You know what needs to be done, and sometimes the best thing to do is to just cut your losses. I think I just need to go back into my office and take a few deep breaths. Dr. Adler's Clinic-Mate: I don't know why I'm writing you this letter. I could not even tell you what I'm upset about. I guess this is just a moment for me to share how I am feeling. It seems like all I do is talk about how much I love my girlfriend. She has the sweetest and gentlest heart. I don't even know how she deserves me, and I always show up with enough money for her to buy whatever she needs. I don't know what to tell her anymore. The other day she asked me to bring her some wine from Mexico. The truth is I don't even have a driver's license, so I don't know how I am going to get to Mexico. I don't have time to lose. What can I do? Dear I Don't Know What to Tell Her, You know that you are doing the right thing by giving your girlfriend a letter like this. There's nothing wrong with loving someone. But this also means you are willing to have the feeling of loving someone even when you do not know what to do next. You say you are not the type to break up. You don't seem like the type who would let anyone down. Dear Dr. Adler, I have been with my boyfriend for two years. I just started college and I'm doing really good in school. My boyfriend and I have different goals in life, and we never see eye to eye. If he doesn't talk about his ideas with me, then we just can't get through the day. He is always complaining about how much he has to do. He takes some time to get ready in the morning, but then we have to go to class right after. He does some studying and I sit around the house. Then we go to the movies and then we come back to his place and watch television all night. Then the next day is the same thing over again. I don't know how I can get through this, and he doesn't know how to be happy. Please help me! –A Happy Girl Dear A Happy Girl, You should have seen me when I was in college. I was a bit of a slacker, but once the semester started, I did everything in my power to make sure I didn't miss a day of class. I could not have cared less about the classes. In fact, I didn't go to class every day either. I used to get up at lunchtime and hang out with my boyfriend instead of going to the library to study for an hour. Then we would go back to his place and watch television. I have some advice for you. I'm sorry, but no one's going to change your boyfriend. The reason he's not making the grade is because he's not motivated enough. He can be really lazy, and this shows in his grades and in his work. There's nothing you can do about it. Sometimes you just have to let people be themselves. Do what you can to help him with his schoolwork. I wish you the best of luck. Dear Dr. Adler, My wife and I have been married for five years. The trouble is that my wife and I don't have sex with each other anymore. We used to have sex almost every night, but now we hardly ever have it. I am not sure why. Maybe she has a lot on her mind. Maybe she is too tired. Maybe it's just getting old. Whatever the case, she just doesn't seem to want it. This has made me sad, and I don't know why. What can I do? –Sexless Dear Sexless, Well, we're back to our favorite topic, right? You are probably wondering what you can do to help your sexless marriage. It's true, things just aren't like they used to be. What's more important is what comes next after they get better. What