Tiffany, you really should reconsider your life choices if you are going to keep such unreasonably high standards for men. Just because someone doesn't carry on a multi-year committed relationship with you doesn't mean that you automatically have the right to withhold your consent. I'm not saying that you should give your boyfriend a hall pass, but I do believe that any rational person would not want to lose the opportunity to actually be with the man that you claim to love so much, because he made one boneheaded move. He didn't hurt you, cheat on you, or lie to you. He was too weak to carry on an actual relationship. You know what you are? You're an emotional terrorist. You say to a guy, "I just want you to love me and not give me any crap," but you're actually expecting him to sign a contract that says you'll never get angry, never talk about anything besides him, and never have any emotional needs of your own. Are you crazy? He's not a Hallmark card. No, he doesn't give you presents, but that's not because he doesn't love you, it's because he has no need to make you a present, he can't even buy a present for himself because you've already taken all his money. Why the hell shouldn't he? Because you gave him no choice. You basically married him by saying you were going to spend the rest of your life with him, never leaving, never saying no. Men are just not built for this kind of thing. If you're not careful, you'll raise a whole bevy of men who either can't make it on their own, or can't make it on their own because of you. Maybe that's what you're going for. But what you're looking for is a little bit more than what those men are willing to commit to. It's understandable, but it's really pathetic. And, if you can't take him for who he is, and leave him, but you still love him, have compassion for him. You don't want to wake up in 20 years and find out that you've been left by the side of the road. That's why you ought to open up your heart, and give this relationship another chance. But you've got to decide right now, right now who you want to be with, and choose him. Not him, choose him. If you don't, your life will be, to use your own words, "A disaster." And you can't even say you haven't been warned. _________________________________________________________________ FWD: Another email from a 'zine, this time from a guy who got dumped... Subject: Bad News I don't know if I will EVER be able to forgive myself. I'm afraid to even try. I'm just so heartbroken over my break-up. It was totally my fault but it was so hard for me to tell him no. This has been eating me up since it happened. It's just the thing that I always dreamed about, but deep down I knew it wouldn't last. It was kind of like a dream and I really believed it. But you know what, it wasn't a dream. We had sex and went out together. We did everything together. Everything was okay until he started getting abusive and we had the fighting and the crying and he stopped taking care of himself and acting like he had any respect for me. The biggest thing was when I finally confronted him about his friends. I'm not saying he did it because he has nothing to say in his defense. He was just not capable of saying no and he got super defensive, so I knew it wasn't going to end well. I even told him if he didn't say anything to me I'd asked about him. The break-up hurt me more than it's going to make you feel. We haven't seen each other since. He has moved on with his life and I'm trying to find the strength to move on with mine. I just feel like a jerk for even letting him touch me. It's just so embarrassing. But I've been doing better. I'm not as depressed. I actually go out and do things. Like see movies, like now. I just don't know when I'll be ready for someone else again. I know I'll be okay because we just did everything wrong. But you never know. I'm too scared to try again because it will never end well. I will always wonder if it was something I did or said to drive him away. I just can't believe I'm even capable of losing someone that I love so much. Sometimes I feel like giving up, but I can't. I promise, I won't screw it up again. I won't lose anyone else. I'm terrified to just give in to the fear that he's better than me because he should be. He knows better. He's learned and I haven't. And it's just fucking eating at me, I don't know what to do. Why is it so damn hard to tell someone no? And why did I care so much that he didn't hurt me when he was angry? Why didn't I just break up with him before he did it? Why was he allowed to get away with treating me so badly? I don't know. Sorry to be so long winded. FWD: So you know how you can tell that a guy is a jerk and has no respect for women? Because when he's with her, he treats her like shit. _________________________________________________________________ >From: "Miro U.S.A." >To: "'Tina @ENRON'" >Subject: FW: >Date: Wed, 23 Oct 2001 11:21:17 -0600 > > >This is some of the dumb shit i had to put up with tonight. I am going to >bed. > >Miro > > > ---------- > > From: Steph B. > > Sent: Monday, October 22, 2001 9:00 AM > > To: Frank; Michelle; Shari; "Jennifer S. (Jahns)" > > Subject: FW: > > > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com - ATT00049.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - Plastic-head.jpg - ATT00010.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - Att00001.jpg - ATT00003.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - Plastic-head.jpg - ATT00010.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - ATT00002.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - ATT00001.jpg - ATT00002.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - Plastic-head.jpg - ATT00003.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - Att00049.jpg - ATT00010.jpg - ATT00001.jpg - ATT00002.jpg - FunnyJunk.jpg - ATT00003.jpg - ATT00010.jpg - Att00001.jpg - ATT00003.jpg