Chris! I told you not to do that. That is going to complicate things. You do what I said. You're on your own with this guy, and we are going to be in Austin Friday. Chris: He's coming on a plane from Houston. Dad: His plane lands at 4:30 in the morning. Just pick him up at the airport. Chris: I don't want to pick him up. It's too risky. Dad: Well, OK. Then leave him at the airport. Chris: What do you mean, "Leave him at the airport?" Dad: "I'm coming to get you!" I'll fly to Houston and get you. Chris: No, I don't want you to get on a plane and halfway through the flight decide you don't want to do this. It's too risky. Dad: I know I'm coming to get you. I'm not going to sit here and argue. Chris: OK, fine. Just don't do anything stupid, please, Dad. I mean it. I don't want to lose you. I don't want to lose either of you. And if anything happens, that I don't go home again, I want you to know I didn't go out somehow trying to rescue Pops and not Mom. I just want us all back home. Dad: Tell him he can fly out with us when I get there. Chris: You are not coming. I already talked to Dad. I already got my ticket. He's just upset. So I'll just finish packing, all right? I'll finish packing and I'll finish out here, and we'll fly out when he gets there. Dad: I'm getting on the plane. I'm coming to get you. Don't do anything stupid. Chris: I love you. Dad: I love you too. Chris: Mom does, too. Dad: I know she does. Chris: She's going to cry if I don't get on that plane. Dad: So are you. Chris: Not as much as Mom. Dad: Tell her I'll be home for Christmas. Chris: I will. And I won't let you down, Dad. Don't worry. Dad: I won't. ----- When I reached home, I told my parents what I'd done and why. I told them that everything was OK, that we'd get him. I told them I loved them. I didn't want to worry them and ruin their holiday. And we all waited for word on Chris. We watched the clock, we talked about him. We got word that the plane took off. They landed. He didn't. They waited at the gate. They kept watching the flight information board. They listened to the tickers on the television news. They heard about the crash on the way. An hour later, there were no answers. A few hours later, a relative got on a plane to bring my father back. My mom decided not to fly to Houston that night. The next morning, a phone call and a knock at the door. He didn't make it. We didn't see him again. After that, we just went back to work and school. It's like everything stopped. Everything except us. That's how it felt. We were left there. We decided to live our lives. One day passed. Then another. After months, years. There's no way to do it. We tried. There's no way to describe what we went through. Chris, he took the loss hard. I saw him cry when we lost him. He still cries sometimes. Dad never really recovered. He still tries to stay active. He'll go to something like a holiday party and sit on the floor and eat. But it's hard for him. We don't talk about him, his loss. We talk about him. We don't talk about the day we lost him. We don't talk about how we felt. We just talk about him. And we don't cry. No one does. We can't. He's gone. No one can understand it. No one can explain it. We just hope he's OK. You can't imagine how hard it is to write this. We'd like to share it with you in case you're going through this pain. There's no end to it. And I'm just glad I could be there for my mom. It's a hell of a story. There's too much loss. There's no ending. There's no final chapter. There's no one to blame. They were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. But there are no answers. And there's no way to make it all right. That's not the lesson here, though. That's the message. They were in the wrong place at the wrong time. And we'll never get that moment back. But we don't want to give up, do we? We don't want to give up. That's the point of this letter, I think. That's what we learned from them. No matter how hard it is, no matter how bad it gets, no matter how much loss we suffer, we just keep going. We have to. It's the only way. We just need to keep going. The good times keep us going, but the tough ones also keep us going. Those are the times we need. We got them there. We can get them there. All of them. We'll be there. We'll make it right. We're not going to give up. If you've ever lost someone you love, it is hard to write. But it is a beautiful thing to share this with you. I know some of you don't think I should be sharing this. I know a lot of you don't understand how I can. But to me, it's all about the love we had. Sharing it with you makes me feel closer to them. And we all have to feel closer, don't we? I'll never forget the day I first got to meet Chris. It's one of my favorites. He was in the hospital. I remember thinking that he looked so terrified. I think he felt more like he was in the wrong place than the right one. But I didn't care. I said he could be in here as long as he needed to be. I don't think he ever really believed that he'd make it. I do believe he'd come back, though. He always came back to us. He would fight. And we never gave up. I hope the messages of hope reach you. We must keep going. No matter how hard it is. No matter how much you think you can't take it. You must. You must just keep going. This is a difficult subject, I know. So many lose someone so very dear. But I can't do it justice if I don't share it. Please don't stop reading. Let me explain why I'm sharing this. I can't get through this without you. I need you. I believe in hope. I believe that if we keep going, eventually we'll make it. Hope is a powerful thing. It can carry us to great heights. But you can't keep it without truth. It was the same with my parents. If we kept going, if we kept hoping, we would have eventually made it through those dark days. We still go to a little spot in the garden, where we planted a tree. We take turns going and just thinking about them. We get their ashes and spread them and go visit. You see, we were the tree. And they were our roots. There is a place we can go. It's a place where we can feel at home. It's a place where we can talk about them. It's a place we can share their loss, even though it was hard to share what was happening. There are other people out there who are hurting. And they need to know that there is a home for them too. My parents left this world at the worst possible time, but they left it strong and sure, knowing the plan God has for each one of us. And their plan was for a good one. He knew how to comfort them. The point of all of this is to never give up. And this is an ending and an ending that's more sad than I can put into words. It is the ending that we don't want. It's the ending that we know has to be. We know we'll get there. And I hope my story can help you keep going in your grief. I hope you can