aidont.com/html/gb/fba/index.htm. **Bright ideas to make your life easier:** You've heard the old bromide about keeping "busy" doing something to avoid the reality of the situation. Well, busyness can be an enormous time-suck in its own right, and if you work long hours, you'll be losing quality time with your family. As for what you _should_ do during a workday, I was once the business owner and president of a consulting company. While we made a ton of money in that job, I never got to hang out with my kids or go on a date. Work sucked the life out of me, and there's no way I would have been able to do it if my kids were smaller or I didn't have a spouse. I'm now an at-home dad who only spends eight hours a week in a high-pressure corporate job. It's really hard for me to leave my kids when I go to work, so I put them to bed at seven in the evening. When I come home I'm able to kiss them and hang out with them for a couple of hours, then cook them dinner and read to them. It's tough, but I'm determined to make it work. Some men may look at it as a sacrifice; I look at it as quality time. **Gifts for the busy man:** • Make a schedule and stick to it. Set a few priorities for your family. Your children aren't waiting for you when you get home from work. • Create a special place for dad. Whether it's a special basket on the couch, a special place in the living room where everyone in the house can leave a little gift, or a photo album with a spot for a note, let dad know you value him. • Get together a list of ways you and your spouse/partner help the family. Don't just leave it as "I'm not sure." When your husband or wife brings up a project or task, write it down, even if you're not sure where you'd fit into the picture. • Do what you have to do first, no matter what. If you don't do it, you're letting your family down, and nobody will ever make any effort again to give you something special. • Make sure you're eating regularly. If your eating habits are out of whack, this will slow you down and have a negative impact on your daily performance. **The most important tip for the busy man:** This is the most important rule for the busy man: Don't worry about what other people are doing. The faster you learn this, the happier you'll be in life. Life is what you make it. If someone gets sick and can't come to work, it's no big deal. When a child wrecks your car, it's not the end of the world. When you get a pay cut, you'll be able to work harder to make up for it. I know guys whose marriages went into the toilet because they became obsessed with what everyone else was doing. There are two kinds of men in life: those who do something positive and those who watch what everyone else is doing. And if you're part of the latter group, you'd better straighten up and get going on the right track. Nothing gets done when you're sitting around daydreaming about other stuff. When you have kids, they've got you occupied for the next two or three decades, so you better watch them closely and make sure they don't ruin their lives. The goal of having kids is to take care of them so they don't have to take care of other people. The real work of having kids is in their bedrooms; it has nothing to do with your bedroom. **THE MILLIONAIRE MOMMA** **D** uring a holiday dinner, all the adults spoke to us about how they had started a new business and were doing well. Then the mom-on-the-go leaned forward and said, "I just want you guys to know that I started my business when I was just 25." All eyes were on us as we nodded politely and listened, as any good guests do. As we moved toward the dessert plate, we all realized that the mom-on-the-go was no ordinary mom. Her kids were well dressed, well spoken, well behaved, and well mannered, her family was solid, and so were her businesses. My friend, who is the head of a real estate development company, asked me what I thought her story might be. Before I could even finish my sentences, the mom-on-the-go let the cat out of the bag and said, "I'm wealthy." Now, you would have thought that in a room full of wealthy people, one of them would have a clue what the rest of them were doing, but no. I knew that mom had to be doing something, and I figured I'd just ask. "Wealthy" is a relative term and is used mostly by women in a nonjudgmental tone when they don't really mean it. When I asked her what she did, she immediately said she was "an event planner." I don't know what people are talking about when they say it's the best job in the world because it is so bad. I'd like to introduce you to the most popular mommy job in the world. The world of event planners. I was a freelance writer at a newspaper in Los Angeles, and when I couldn't sell enough pages, my editor said to me, "If you're really good, you can make a lot of money as a party planner." Like a fool, I asked what the business was. She said it was basically a combination of caterers and car dealers. This is how we know this industry is for kids. She asked what I knew about catering, and I told her the only thing I had to eat was a pizza from Domino's and the only thing I knew about car dealers was that I hated them. She made me a party planner. You can check out partyplanner.com to see how they do it and why they're really the millionaire momma. **Gifts for the busy woman:** • Ask her what she does. If you don't know her, ask her what she does for a living. Once you find out her business, you'll be able to help her and help yourself. • Get advice from friends. Look for a women who has made it in the business and talk to her about her struggles and successes. She'll help you make decisions. If the woman is busy, take her out for coffee. If she's got some time on her hands, bring her lunch. • Make your time with your kids a real priority. The more time you have with your kids, the more time you'll spend with them. This is a priceless gift. The more time you can spend, the more you'll get out of it. • Take a few moments for yourself. While I've always been a little too tired to take naps, I understand that my busy schedule has kept me from doing it. My solution was to make sure I napped in the car on the way home from work. I'd sit in the backseat, put in a movie, and fall asleep. It only took 15 minutes, but it made a difference. I knew that when I woke up I was only ten or 15 minutes away from my bed. • Keep a list of what you've done each day. Take five minutes when you get up to write down a few things you did for the family and for yourself that day. • Have something special that you do with your kids each day. Whether it's taking them to a park or your own special activity, make sure you do it. **The most important tip for the busy woman:** If you aren't being good to yourself, you're not going to be able to take good care of anyone else. Make yourself a priority. I think a lot of times moms get caught up in trying to look good at the party and forgetting what's important to them, so I encourage her to remember who she really is. You are going to be a better mother because of the gift of time. Don't you want your kids to see you as a strong woman? If you don't get enough sleep, don't even show up for the party. When you leave the office at night, you have to be in bed by 9:00 P.M. Make sure your kids see you and know who you are. **AN UBER-PROUD MALE** **I** was sitting at the office when I got a phone call from one of my daughters. "Dad, are you home?" "Yes, I'm home," I said. "Great! I've got something great to tell you. Mom just came home with the kids." "The kids are home?" I asked. "Yeah, they're home." "Great, where are they?" "They're at the house, but they don't want me to tell you. I think they might have gotten you into trouble." That's not an issue here, I thought to myself. "I'll see you in an hour," I said. I went to